“Konakalaphi?” Lo mbuzo wawumkhathaza uMichael, * waseNingizimu Afrika. Yize ayeye wazikhandla ukuze abe ubaba omuhle, njalo lapho ecabanga ngendodana yakhe eyihlongandlebe eneminyaka engu-19 ubudala, wayezibuza ukuthi kukhona yini okumelwe ngabe wakwenza ukuze abe umzali ongcono.

Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uTerry, ohlala eSpain, ubonakala eye waphumelela njengobaba. Indodana yakhe, u-Andrew, ithi: “Okuningi engikukhumbulayo ngobaba ngesikhathi ngisemncane ukuthi wayengifundela, edlala nami futhi ehamba nami siye lapho sasingazihlalela khona sisodwa. Wayenza ukufunda kujabulise.”

Kuyavunywa, akulula ukuba ubaba omuhle. Kodwa kunezimiso eziyisisekelo ezingasiza. Obaba abaningi bathole ukuthi bona nemikhaya yabo bayazuza uma benza ngokuvumelana nokuhlakanipha okutholakala eBhayibhelini. Ake sixoxe ngezinye zezeluleko zeBhayibheli eziwusizo ezingasiza obaba.

Njengobaba, ubabonisa kanjani abantwana bakho ukuthi babalulekile kuwe? Ngokuqinisekile ziningi izinto ozenzela abantwana bakho, ezihlanganisa ukuzidela ukuze ubondle futhi ubatholele nendawo yokuhlala efanelekayo. Ubungeke uzenze lezo zinto ukube abantwana bakho bebengabalulekile kuwe. Noma kunjalo, uma ungachithi isikhathi esanele nabo, bangase baphethe ngokuthi ukhathalela kakhulu ezinye izinto kunabo, njengomsebenzi, abangane bakho noma ezokuzilibazisa.

Ubaba kufanele aqale nini ukuchitha isikhathi nabantwana bakhe? Umama uqala ukwakha ubuhlobo nomntanakhe lapho esesesibelethweni. Ngemva kwamasonto angaba ngu-16, usana olungakazalwa lungase luqale ukuzwa. Ngalesi sikhathi, nobaba angaqala ukwakha ubuhlobo obuseduze nosana lwakhe olungakazalwa. Angalalela ukushaya kwenhliziyo yalo, alulalele lapho lukhahlela, akhulume nalo futhi aluculele.

Isimiso SeBhayibheli: Ngezikhathi zeBhayibheli amadoda ayehileleke ngokuqondile ekufundiseni izingane zawo. Obaba babekhuthazwa ukuba njalo bachithe isikhathi nabantwana babo, njengoba kufakazelwa amazwi eBhayibheli akuDuteronomi 6:6, 7, athi: “La mazwi engikuyala ngawo namuhla kumelwe abe senhliziyweni yakho; kumelwe uwagxilise kubantwana bakho futhi ukhulume ngawo lapho uhleli endlini yakho nalapho uhamba endleleni nalapho ulala nalapho uvuka.”

Ukuze ukhulumisane kahle nezingane zakho, kumelwe ube isilaleli esihle. Kufanele uhlakulele ikhono lokulalela ngaphandle kokuthukuthela.

Uma izingane zakho zicabanga ukuthi uzosheshe ucasuke futhi uzahlulele kabi, ngeke zikhululeke kangako ukukuvezela imizwa yazo. Kodwa uma uzilalela ngesineke, kuyobonisa ukuthi uzikhathalela ngobuqotho. Nazo ziyobe sezithambekela kakhudlwana ekukutsheleni ezikucabangayo nendlela ezizizwa ngayo.

Isimiso SeBhayibheli: Ukuhlakanipha okutholakala eBhayibhelini kubonakale kuzuzisa ezicini eziningi zokuphila kwansuku zonke. Ngokwesibonelo, iBhayibheli lithi: “Wonke umuntu kumelwe asheshe ukuzwa, ephuze ukukhuluma, ephuze ukuthukuthela.” (Jakobe 1:19) Obaba abasebenzisa lesi simiso seBhayibheli bayakwazi ukukhulumisana kangcono nezingane zabo.

Ngisho nalapho ukhungathekile noma uthukuthele, isiyalo osikhiphayo kufanele sibonise ukuthi uyikhathalela ngothando inhlalakahle yesikhathi eside yengane yakho. Sihlanganisa ukuyeluleka, ukuyiqondisa, ukuyifundisa nokuyishaya lapho kudingeka.

Ngaphezu kwalokho, isiyalo siphumelela ngokwengeziwe uma ubaba ezincoma njalo izingane zakhe. Isaga sasendulo sithi: “Izwi elikhulunywe ngesikhathi esifanele linjengama-apula egolide ezitsheni zesiliva.” (IzAga 25:11) Ukuncoma kuthuthukisa izimfanelo ezinhle kumntwana. Abantwana baba nokuzethemba uma beqashelwa futhi baziswa. Ubaba ofuna amathuba okuncoma usiza ekwakheni ukuzethemba kubantwana bakhe futhi ubakhuthaza ukuba bangayeki ukuzama ukwenza okulungile.

Isimiso SeBhayibheli: “Nina bobaba, ningabathukuthelisi abantwana benu, ukuze bangadangali.”—Kolose 3:21.

Indlela ubaba afeza ngayo indima yakhe njengomyeni nakanjani inomthelela kubantwana. Elinye iqembu lezazi zokukhula kwabantwana liyachaza: “Enye yezinto ezinhle kakhulu ubaba angayenzela abantwana bakhe ukuhlonipha umama wabo. . . . Ubaba nomama abahloniphanayo futhi benze abantwana babo bakwazi lokho babenza bazizwe belondekile.”—The Importance of Fathers in the Healthy Development of Children. *

Isimiso SeBhayibheli: “Madoda, qhubekani nithanda omkenu . . . Yilowo nalowo kini makamthande kanjalo umkakhe njengoba ezithanda yena.”—Efesu 5:25, 33.

Obaba abathanda uNkulunkulu ngokusuka enhliziyweni banganika abantwana babo ifa eliyigugu kakhulu—ubuhlobo obuseduze noYise wabo osezulwini.

Ngemva kokuzikhandla amashumi eminyaka ekhulisa abantwana abayisithupha, u-Antonio, ongomunye woFakazi BakaJehova, wathola le ncwadi emfushane ivela kwenye yamadodakazi akhe: “Baba othandekayo, bengifisa ukukubonga ngokungikhulisa ngendlela yokuba ngithande uJehova uNkulunkulu, umakhelwane wami nami ngizithande—okungukuthi, ngibe umuntu okahle. Wangibonisa ukuthi uyamthanda uJehova nokuthi nami uyangikhathalela. Ngiyabonga baba, ngokwenza uJehova eze kuqala ekuphileni kwakho nangokuphatha abantwana bakho njengezipho ezivela kuNkulunkulu!”

Isimiso SeBhayibheli: “Kumelwe uthande uJehova uNkulunkulu wakho ngayo yonke inhliziyo yakho nangawo wonke umphefumulo wakho nangawo onke amandla akho. La mazwi engikuyala ngawo namuhla kumelwe abe senhliziyweni yakho.”—Duteronomi 6:5, 6.

Kusobala ukuthi kuningi okuhilelekile ekubeni ubaba kunala maphuzu amahlanu, nokuthi eqinisweni, ngisho noma uzama kangakanani ukuba ubaba omuhle, ngeke ube ubaba ophelele. Kuye ngezinga osebenzisa ngalo lezi zimiso ngothando nangokulinganisela, empeleni ungakwazi ukuba ubaba omuhle. *